Why you already are good enough

 

 

  𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝓉𝑒𝒶𝒸𝒽 𝓉𝑜𝒹𝒶𝓎'𝓈 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓃𝑔 𝓅𝑒𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒 𝑜𝓃𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔, 𝒾𝓉 𝓌𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝒷𝑒, 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝑒𝓃𝑜𝓊𝑔𝒽, 𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓇𝓎 𝒹𝒶𝓎, 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓌𝒶𝓎 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶𝓇𝑒. 𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒𝒹 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓉𝑜𝓅 𝑜𝒻 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝒽𝑒𝒶𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓉𝒾𝓅𝓈 𝑜𝒻 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓉𝑜𝑒𝓈. 𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝒶𝓃 𝒾𝓃𝒸𝓇𝑒𝒹𝒾𝒷𝓁𝑒 𝒸𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃, 𝑒𝓃𝒿𝑜𝓎 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝑜𝓌𝓃 𝒷𝑒𝒶𝓊𝓉𝓎.”
𝑀𝑜𝓁𝓁𝓎 𝑀𝒶𝒽𝒶𝓇

 

Do you even realise how amazing you already are? You may not have been top of your class, you were not this month's employee of the month, and you may not be as pretty as you believe your partner would like you to be. Still, you juggle schedules both at home and at work, you manage a household and the children while keeping everything organised down to the last detail. Simultaneously, you always find the time and energy to spend time with your friends and family. In spite of how defeated and not enough you may feel, I'm here to tell you that you already are good enough, just as you are.

Not feeling good enough is a common denominator of all emotional issues nowadays.This fear is one of the deepest, most fundamental fears every human being on the planet has. It's our mind's default setting. When you don't feel enough, you can't seem to get enough of anything- be it food, shopping or even gambling. The feeling of not enough-ness can be traced back to childhood, in our formative years, where one harsh comment or even worse, abuse, can cause the child to not feel enough to be loved by its parent.It is at the root of all emotional pain that results in overeating, excessive shopping, procrastination, self-hatred or self-sabotage.

 

 

𝓗𝓸𝔀 𝓽𝓸 𝓭𝓮𝓪𝓵 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓲𝓽

Once you have recognised what lies at the root of your emotional pain, make a choice to remove it or at least to minimise it. In this way, you can reactivate the feeling of enoughness you were born with. Some ways to cope are the following.

*Start being kinder to yourself. Go easy on yourself for a change and give yourself some credit for all the great things you 've already accomplished and acknowledge that it is not always easy to be you. You are as deserving of love and kindness as any other person on this planet.

*Avoid comparisons with other people on social media. It is disastrous to resort to comparisons with social media icons, celebrities or other more successful individuals. Your life, your experiences are totally different to theirs and you cannot therefore consider yourself lesser than them. It is just nonsensical. Love yourself at this stage of your life and strive to get better daily.You carry your own worth. Own it and honor it!

*Be mindful of those pesky, negative thoughts as they arise.  Avoid getting caught up in negative self-talk.Don't focus on the negative rather focus on what is going right in your life right now. A great way of getting rid of negative self-talk is the use of affirmations such as "I am enough", "I am special", "I have amazing coping skills" to name but a few.

* Create a list of the things you're good at. Seeing as we're so hard on ourselves most of the time, I realise it's not as easy as it seems. More often than not we are pathetic at recognising our strong points and our inherent worth. Write down what you do well, and refer to this list whenever you are feeling down. It should be a great boost to pick yourself back up.

*Spend time with positive and supportive people.  Strive to surround yourself with people who are encouraging and supportive of you. People who will show you that it's not just you facing this issue.That way you will not feel alone in your struggle with your self-worth.

*Practise self-care. Our reactions and our perception of our self-image significantly worsen when we are sleep deprived or have poor self-care habits. Regulate your sleep patterns, cater to a nutritious diet and tend to your personal hygiene. Taking regular breaks from social media is also necessary on a weekly basis. Finally, don't even attempt at keeping everyone pleased, that's not your job.Not to mention it's emotionally and energetically draining.

*Find out what your passions are. Discovering what you're passionate about will distract you from focusing on negative feelings and thoughts and will provide  the motivation you need to keep moving forward towards your goals.

 

 

 

I will leave you with the amazing words of Kathy Brown, who summarises the notion of enoughness so beautifully:

    “𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝒹𝑒𝓈𝑒𝓇𝓋𝑒 𝓉𝑜 𝒷𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓅𝓇𝑜𝓉𝒶𝑔𝑜𝓃𝒾𝓈𝓉 𝑜𝒻 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝑜𝓌𝓃 𝓌𝑜𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇𝒻𝓊𝓁, 𝒷𝒾𝓏𝒶𝓇𝓇𝑒, 𝓉𝑒𝓇𝓇𝒾𝒻𝓎𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓁𝒾𝓉𝓉𝓁𝑒 𝓁𝒾𝒻𝑒. 𝐼𝒻 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒹𝑒𝒸𝒾𝒹𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝑒𝓃𝑜𝓊𝑔𝒽, 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝑒𝓃𝑜𝓊𝑔𝒽. 𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝒹𝑜𝓃'𝓉 𝓃𝑒𝑒𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝓌𝒶𝒾𝓉 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓈𝑜𝓂𝑒 𝑔𝓇𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝑒𝓍𝓉𝑒𝓇𝓃𝒶𝓁 𝓋𝒶𝓁𝒾𝒹𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃 𝑜𝒻 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓌𝑜𝓇𝓉𝒽 𝒷𝑒𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝑜𝒻𝒻𝑒𝓇 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓀𝒾𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓈𝓉 𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇𝓈𝑒𝓁𝒻.”

As always, sending you ripples of positivity and love,

Lia